Take Your Seat, Claim Your Space
By Babette Dunkelgrün, Yoga for Eating Disorders Writer
Working with Jennifer in recent months on the manuscript for her upcoming book, The Courageous Path to Healing (April 2022, Llewellyn Worldwide), which details her own eating disorder recovery journey and what she learned along the way, I often heard her speak about the idea of “taking your seat.” In fact, there’s a whole chaper about it! I’d never heard that phrase before, besides on flights while getting ready for take-off.
Since it’s now on my radar, I’ve heard “take your seat” come up during dharma talks by teachers like Jon Kabat Zinn and during a Zoom yoga class. I’m grateful Jennifer has me paying attention to this phrase.
In a literal sense alone, the concept means many things: it can look like taking up space in the world, rather than hiding, isolating, or acting small. It also tells me that how I sit matters, even if I often overlook this part of living. Whether I’m in a mindfulness practice or just in a work meeting, driving home or having dinner, to ground myself in where I am in a comfortable, present way, feels important now.
And then, I can expand the meaning for myself from there. For instance, what would it mean to take my seat in a more metaphorical sense? In AA there is a saying, keeping my side of the street clean...meaning, minding my business. In recovery, taking my seat can emphasize the MY part, which helps with autonomy and setting boundaries.
The older I get, the closer I am to realizing nobody has the answers for me. So much of the work then becomes about self-trust and relying on me to figure out my own answers (and questions to ask) while navigating daily life. That, too, is a kind of “taking a seat.”
I think those flight attendants I referred to earlier were on to something. If you have a ticket (you’re alive) and you are on the plane/planet, it’s time to take your seat :)
What does take your seat mean to you?
If you’re curious to learn more, keep your eyes open for the publication of Jennifer’s upcoming book, The Courageous Path to Healing.
Babette Dunkelgrün has served as a journalist in print and online media, as well as a non-fiction editor in book publishing. Based in Berkeley, CA, Babette offers mindful retreats and writes for our blog. As a Brave Writing Coach, Babette’s teaching is rooted in curiosity, the firm belief that telling your story is medicine, and the joy of creativity. She constantly furthers her education, digging deep into yoga as a practice (RYT-200) and drawing from her studies in addiction and recovery (Berkeley Extension, Y12SR, IE, Institute for Integrative Nutrition, Body Trust). On and off the mat, expect a blend of trauma-informed yoga, accessible mindfulness, embodied connection, and expressive arts.